BANAT for the DAY:
“Kung my rabis ang laway mo… handa akong maulol.. maka’halik lang sau!!”
SMS courtesy of Wow_Kalabaw
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GF: “‘gano mo ko kamahal?”
BF: (Hinawakan kamay ni gf at inilagay sa loob ng brief at nagsalita …)
“…kaw ang dahilan sa bawat pagtigas nito”…
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SAKRISTAN: “Father nakita ko yong pilay nagdasal sa altar tapos tinapon ang saklay nya at naglakad!”
PARI: “Diyos ko! “Isa ‘tong himala! Asan sya?”
SAKRISTAN: “Andun po nakadapa, sabog ang nguso!”
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thru text..
gf: “yoko na sa yo! Break na tayo!”
bf: “ha? Ano ba problema? Ano kasalanan ko?”
gf: “Ay! sorry hon, wrong send..Love you!”
bf: “Haay, kala ko naman kung ano na…love you too!
SMS courtesy of Steely
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When cherry becomes red,
It is ready to be sucked.
When a girl becomes 18, she is ready to . . .
.
.
.
VOTE!
God bless your mind.
SMS courtesy of Selvo
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QUESTION: Why is ORGASM a 6-letter word?
ANSWER: Because it’s easier to spell than…
“woahwoahwow …ohmygodyesoohhdeeperaahh …yesfasterohgodyesyesimcomingahh!”
SMS courtesy of Wow_Kalabaw
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ANAK: “Tay me man0k sa kusina tinutuka yung bigas”.
TATAY: “Paalisin mo.”
ANAK: “oy manok alis ka daw”
TATAY: “Tanga! Takutin mo!”
ANAK: “Manok, mumu ako! awooo!”
TATAY: “Bobo! Bugawin mo!”
ANAK: “Boss, chicks! P50 lng”
SMS courtesy of Danskiedo
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One night lola wear sexy dress, Lolo didn’t react.
Second night lola wear T-back, lolo stila dedma.
Third night lola all bold, lolo said:
“ano ba yang suot mo.. gusot-gusot?
SMS courtesy of NJ Santos
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Dalawang langaw nakadapo sa ibabaw ng basang TAE.
Langaw1: “Mare, nae-ebs ako!”
Langaw2: “Yuck! Kadiri ka naman! Ano ka ba, wag ka ngang ganyan at eto kumakain tayo!”
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TV HOST: “To whom do you owe your becoming a millionaire?”
TONY BOY COJUANGCO: “I owe it all to my live-in partner Gretchen Barretto.”
TV HOST: “Wow! What were you before you lived-in with Gretchen?”
TONY BOY COJUANGCO: “I was then a BILLIONAIRE.”
SMS courtesy of Arch
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Barrio Fiesta is introducing a new dish for this month!
It’s a mix of shrimps & snails
They call it
“HINIPONG SUSO” (Ingat sa pagbasa!)
SMS courtesy of Arch
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