SMS Jokes 10.17.08

BANAT for the DAY:

“Kung my rabis ang laway mo… handa akong maulol.. maka’halik lang sau!!”

SMS courtesy of Wow_Kalabaw

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GF: “‘gano mo ko kamahal?”
BF:  (Hinawakan kamay ni gf at inilagay sa loob ng brief at nagsalita …)

“…kaw ang dahilan sa bawat pagtigas nito”…

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SAKRISTAN: “Father nakita ko yong pilay nagdasal sa altar tapos tinapon ang saklay nya at naglakad!”
PARI: “Diyos ko! “Isa ‘tong himala! Asan sya?”
SAKRISTAN: “Andun po nakadapa, sabog ang nguso!” 

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thru text..
gf: “yoko na sa yo! Break na tayo!”
bf: “ha? Ano ba problema? Ano kasalanan ko?”
gf: “Ay! sorry hon, wrong send..Love you!”
bf: “Haay, kala ko naman kung ano na…love you too! 

SMS courtesy of Steely

*  * *

When cherry becomes red,

It is ready to be sucked. 

When a girl becomes 18, she is ready to . . .

.

.

VOTE!

God bless your mind.

SMS courtesy of Selvo

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QUESTION: Why is ORGASM a 6-letter word?
ANSWER: Because it’s easier to spell than… 

“woahwoahwow …ohmygodyesoohhdeeperaahh …yesfasterohgodyesyesimcomingahh!”

SMS courtesy of Wow_Kalabaw

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ANAK: “Tay me man0k sa kusina tinutuka yung bigas”.
TATAY: “Paalisin mo.”
ANAK: “oy manok alis ka daw”
TATAY: “Tanga! Takutin mo!”
ANAK: “Manok, mumu ako! awooo!”
TATAY: “Bobo! Bugawin mo!”
ANAK: “Boss, chicks! P50 lng” 

SMS courtesy of Danskiedo

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One night lola wear sexy dress, Lolo didn’t react.
Second night lola wear T-back, lolo stila dedma.
Third night lola all bold, lolo said:

“ano ba yang suot mo.. gusot-gusot?

SMS courtesy of NJ Santos

* * *

Dalawang langaw nakadapo sa ibabaw ng basang TAE. 

Langaw1: “Mare, nae-ebs ako!”
Langaw2: “Yuck! Kadiri ka naman! Ano ka ba, wag ka ngang ganyan at eto kumakain tayo!”

* * *

TV HOST: “To whom do you owe your becoming a millionaire?”                  
TONY BOY COJUANGCO: “I owe it all to my live-in partner Gretchen Barretto.” 
TV HOST: “Wow! What were you before you lived-in with Gretchen?”
TONY BOY COJUANGCO: “I was then a BILLIONAIRE.”

SMS courtesy of Arch

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Barrio Fiesta is introducing a new dish for this month!

It’s a mix of shrimps & snails

They call it 

“HINIPONG SUSO”  (Ingat sa pagbasa!)

SMS courtesy of Arch

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