SMS Jokes 03.27.09 (Friday)

Gintong Kasabihan:

Kapag tinanong ka ng mga maguLang mo kung anung napapaLa mu sa kakainom, sabihin mu lang sa kanila na…

“Hindi lahat ng bata sa mundo nakakaranas makatikim ng alak..”

SMS courtesy of JEN

* * * *

Banat of the Day
Girl: “baka naman malusaw ako nyan kakatitig mo.ü”
Boy: “ganun ba…parang ice cream?”
Girl: “Oo.. hihi.ü”
Boy: “lika nga dito…dilaan kita..”

SMS courtesy of JEN

*  *  *  *
NEWSFLASH:
Panic in Boracay as woman in cottage shouts “tsunami” in the middle of the night. Apparently, she was having sex w/her boyfriend asking, “CHEW NA ME!”

SMS courtesy of Mike

* * * *
Sen. Lito Lapid was shocked by d news that Lacson masterminded the Dacer twin murders.
Lapid was heard saying, “grabe nman siya! d na naawa sa kambal” .

SMS courtesy of Mike

* * * *

A man was in a bar looking dejected that a friend walked over and asked what’s wrong..

MAN: (shaking his head)” It’s my mother-in-law. I have a real problem with her.”

FRIEND: “Cheer up! Everyone has problems with his mother-in-law.”

MAN: “Yeah, but not everybody gets her pregnant.”

SMS courtesy of Mike

* * * *
The Pentagon did a study on why so many American Servicemen marry women in the countries where they’re stationed.

Contrary to popular belief, loneliness has nothing to do with it. Once they are rotated back to the U.S. all their mothers-in-law were thousand of miles away.

SMS courtesy of Mike

* * * *
A mother had been constantly showing her daughter how to do everything. It came to pass the girl got married.

Of course, the mother tagged along on the honeymoon. That night, the daughter was heard to say, ‘But, Mom, I’d rather do it myself!’

SMS courtesy of Mike

* * * *
Thought For The Day:

Reports showed that intellectuals don’t have much sex. You can use this data as justification for your life of celibacy.

SMS courtesy of Mike

* * * *
BREAKING NEWS:
The Vatican has decided today that it is not a sin to kiss a nun, just don’t get in the habit.

SMS courtesy of Mike

* * * *

PARE1: “Anong sabi ng misis mo nung umuwi ka kagabi na lasing na lasing?”

PARE2: “Tahimik lang siya. Hindi siya nagsalita habang binubugbog ako!!!”

SMS courtesy of Mike

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