Waiter : “Would you like your coffee black?”
Customer : “What other colors do you have?”
* * * *
Teacher : “Now, Sam, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating?”
Sam : “No sir, I don’t have to, my mom is a good cook”.
* * * *
Teacher : ” Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE? ”
One Student : “Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day and at the same time.”
* * * *
JUDGE: ”Isa ka palang pusher, kidnapper, gun for hire, gambling lord, swindler at bugaw! Wala ka bang matinong hanapbuhay?”
ACCUSED: ” Meron po. Pulis po ako.”
* * * *
KRIMINAL1: “Pare, sigurado ka bang dito dadaan yung papatayin natin?”
KRIMINAL2: “Oo, nagtataka nga ako, 1 oras na tayo dito wala parin siya! Sana naman walang nangyaring masama sa kanya.”
If mildew starts to show on your upholstered furniture or rugs, then just brush it off thoroughly. If possible, do this outdoors where they get lots of sun and fresh air. Should mildew stains remain stubborn, sponge lightly with thick suds, then wipe clean with damp cloth. 
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