Gold For Mom

Moms need a time-out, too. Whether your mom is a career woman working an eight-to-five job, or a full-time mom taking care of the home 24/7, she deserves a break once in while. Give your mom a pampering they deserve like treating her to brunch in a classy restaurant or maybe let her avail a prepaid luxurious service of a chic spa saloon.

gold
On Christmas, give her some gold jewelry. Definitely, you cannot go wrong in giving her gold as a gift. Why gold jewelry? No one can deny that women love gold jewelry and the reason why women love jewelries varies from woman to woman. Some like jewels made of gold because it makes them feel good when they wear it. Some perhaps wear it to show their wealth or social status, and some just wear it because it is pretty.

SMS Jokes 16

“Aanhin pa ang gabi, kung wala naman katabi.”
Eh may nakarinig:
“Eh anong silbi ng may katabi kung wala namang nangyayari.”
May humirit:
“Eh ano naman kung may nangyayari kung wala namang nabubuong baby.”
Eh my affected:
“Paano may mabubuong baby kung parehas kayong LALAKE!!

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LOLA: Lab, what do u think about sex?
LOLO: Well, at d age of 8, I ignored it.. at age 18, I experienced it..at age 28, I was looking it.. at age 48, I begged 4 it.. at age 68, I prayed for it..& now at age 78.. Ano nga ulit ang pinaguusapan natin?

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Three wives talking about their husbands…
Ising: Ang asawa ko parang Rolls Royce, madulas at magara.
Juaning: Ang akin parang Porsche, mabilis at mapwersa.
Luring: Asawa ko parang lumang jeepney. Kailangan pang itulak ng kamay, pagkatapos sakyan agad KUNG umandar!

* * * * *

Sa tindahan ni aling diony.Pulis: isang coke nga.
Tindera: maestro ka, ser?
Pulis: hindi, pulis ako.
Tindera: maestro ka nga ba, ser?
Pulis: bingi!! Pulis ako!
Tindera: ay, bubu kang pulis ka! tenatanung keta kung sesepsepen mu…sa estro!…
Tsk, tsk, tsk!…

* * * * *

Q: Why is a man’s pee yellow and his sperm white?
A: To enable him to tell if he’s coming or going.

* * * * * *

Late one night, a man walks into a dentist’s clinic and says, “Excuse me, can you help me? I think I’m a moth.”
DENTIST: You need a psychiatrist.
MAN: Yes, I know.
DENTIST: Then why did you come here.
MAN: The lights were on.

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Car Insurance Renewal

It is going to be the beginning of a new year again, a time for renewal, for change, for fresh beginnings. Mind you, it is going to be new spending also for all motorists who are due to renew their car insurance. To all car owners out there, better scout for auto insurance quotes now and compare. You can save money by finding insurance company that gives lowest, competitive rate and further discount.

Cool and Sophisticated

flat screen tv

Before, I used to see TV wall mounts in resto-bars, hotels, offices and other public establishments only. However, since the invention of flat screen TVs, the practice of TV wall mounting has become more and more popular and have come their way to household too. One of the several reasons why wall-mounted TV is cool is because there is a level of class and touch of sophistication by simply installing one.

SMS Jokes 15

Pacman recently cancelled endorsement c0ntract w/ Mcdo!
Nagalit kasi bakit daw he’s been promoting its product, but still their slogan is –
“Love Co To”

* * * * *

Don’t close your door when you feel alone..
Don’t close your heart when you want to love..
And don’t close your legs kung gusto mong makatikim nang sarap sa kama! 😉

* * * * *
It’s a fact…
being sex starved is natural to us..

We are only humans. So if someone tells you, “Manyak ka ba?” just turn your back and say, “Affected ka ba? Tandaan mo, walang gamot sa tigang!”

* * * * *

While in a pub in England, a condom machine had this on the ad: “Manufactured to strict British standards.”
Underneath, someone scratched, “So was the Titanic.”

* * * * *
A woman answered her front door and found two little boys with a list. “Lady,” one of them explains, “we’re on a scavenger hunt and we need 3 grains of wheat, a porkchop bone and a piece of used carbon paper to earn a dollar.”

“Wow,” woman replies, “who sent you on such errand?”

“Our baby-sitter’s boyfriend,” the two kids answers back.

* * * * *

3 guys were having an argument about who was more generously endowed. To settle the argument, they went to the top of the Empire State and unzipped their pants.

“Pretty good, huh,” said the 1st whose cock was hanging down to the 58th floor.

“That’s nothing,” said the 2nd, whose penis went down to a window just above the 48th.

They both looked over the 3rd guy who was moving around very strangely, jumping from one foot to the other. “What the hell are you doing?” asked the two. Third guy answered, “I’m dodging traffic!”

* * * * *

What does a balloon and a man have in common?
They both enlarge when you “blow” them.

* * * * *
At the first session of a conversion class, the pastor conducting the class asked, “What must we do before we can expect forgiveness from sin?”

After a long silence, one of men raised his hand and said, “Sin?”

* * * * *
Sexy Facts of Life:
Fate is liked getting raped; if you can’t fight it, learn to enjoy it.
Work is like a gang bang: people are behind you to take your place.
Education is like hiring a prostitute; it needs both money and hard work.
Success is like masturbation; only your own hand can let you achieve it. 😉
A bit green but makes sense, right?

* * * * *

QUOTATION OF THE DAY:

“He who loses wealth loses much;
he who loses a friend loses more;
but he who loses his erection loses all!”

* * * * *

What is the meaning of ‘sanctity’?
It’s French , for a lady with five(cinque, prounounced as sanc) breasts…

* * * * *

BEN: Anong sabi ni boss tungkol sa bonus natin?

Tony: Ok! Ibibigay daw! Ang kondisyon- kungmay makita daw tayong…
13th at 14th month sa kalendaryo!

* * * * *
Definition of
Tragedy…

It’s when your zipper
gets stuck when it
is the time to
fuck!

* * * **

Dick and balls arguing…

BALLS: bakit di mo kami sinasama pgpumapasok ka sa loob? Ikaw lang ang nag-eenjoy!

PENIS: Akala nyo masarap sa loob? Suka nga ako nang suka doon eh!!!

* * * * * *

ALL ABOVE SMS JOKES courtesy of MIKE

More Discount, Please

I have a family with bad set of teeth. Even before, my late parents down to my siblings…we can only wish for sparkling white, good set of teeth in our lives. Well, there is nothing we can do about it – it is in our genes. However, what we can only pray now is that, hope our dentist would give us dental care discounts whenever we run to him for our dental problem.

Right Weight

When it comes to weight loss topic, many people are unhappy with their present weight. Many are not sure on how to solve and change their body figure that sometimes they would resort to crash dieting and diet pills. There is nothing wrong on taking pills as long as those are safe weight loss pills. If only people realize that being healthy – it is about being at a weight that is right for you. Well, it really helps to talk to a doctor or dietician to help you set realistic goals on weight loss.

Euro Tour ’09 – Mulheim, Germany

Aaminin ko, ako na yata ang taong walang kahilig-hilig na mag pose sa harap ng camera.

Papatunayan ko sa inyo sa mga sumusunod na larawan.

Photo location: Mulheim, Germany

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O ha! Kita nyo naman. Ayan na ang mga ebidensya. Di ba sobrang obyus na wala akong kahilig-hilig sa mga kodakan na yan?!

Hahahahaha!

Oi! Blog ko ‘to kaya wag na kayo komontra. Ang komontra ay…lulugain!

oOo

Quote of the Day:
“If you want to be miserable, think about yourself, about what you want, what you like, what respect people ought to pay you and what people think of you.” – –Charles Kingsley

While writing this, I was listening to , If Your Today Was Your Last day – by Nickelback.

It’s Christmas Again


xmasshopper

Went out yesterday with my daughter to have our weekly food marketing and since it is weekend; the mall is packed with people. I guess yearly bonus and 13th month-pay of those who are employed is finally out and released. I can see many shoppers doing their early shopping of holiday gifts for their loved ones and some are into buying of Christmas decorations. Truly, Christmas is in the air!

E-Cigarette

I was surprised and never thought that there is already such thing as e cigarette not until I got this assignment to blog about it.

Whew! It is good news to cigarette smokers because it is a healthier alternative indeed! No more tar and nicotine that can keep one addicted to smoking and give dangers to health. What is an electronic cigarette by the way? Well, according to Wikipedia…

An electronic cigarette, otherwise known as a personal vaporizer, is a battery-powered device that provides inhaled doses of nicotine by way of a vaporized solution. It is an alternative to smoked tobacco products, such as cigarettes, cigars, or pipes. In addition to nicotine delivery, this vapor also provides a flavor and physical sensation similar to that of

inhaled tobacco smoke, while no tobacco, smoke, or combustion is actually involved in its operation.
An electronic cigarette usually takes the form of some manner of elongated tube, though many are designed to resemble the outward appearance of real smoking products, like cigarettes, cigars, and pipes. A common design is also the “pen-style”, so named for its visual resemblance to a ballpoint pen. Most electronic cigarettes are reusable devices with replaceable and refillable parts. A number of disposable electronic cigarettes have also been developed.

Smokers can have a wiser choice now. Check out this site for more about electronic cigarettes.