BATA: Pabili pong juice.
ALE: ‘Yung nasa powder?
BATA: Baket meron po ba kayong juice na naka-bareta?!
oOo
Mom Centipede: Hoy Kanina pa kita inuutusan di ka pa rin nakakaalis?!
Baby Centipede: Haller! Nagtsitsinelas pa ko! Excited?!
oOo
Voice coach ka ba?
Pinapataas mo kasi nota ko.
oOo
Q: What’s the closest thing you have similar to a woman’s period?
A: Your SALARY! It comes once a month lasts only for about six or seven days, and if doesn’t come it means you’re in a whole lot of trouble! :-*
oOo
A Woman was Kidnapped. The Kidnapper Sent a Piece of her Finger to her Husband & Demanded Money.Husband Replied :”I Want More Proof!!”
oOo
“My wife is the most suspicious woman in the world,” complained a husband. “If I come home early, she thinks I’m after something. And if I come home late, she thinks I’ve already had it.”:D
oOo
One ovary says to the other ovary, “Hey, did you order any furniture?”
The other ovary says, “No, why?”
“There are a couple of nuts trying to shove an organ in.”
oOo
Pulis: Bayad ko sa kape o.
Tsino: Aba, bakit ka bayad?
Pulis: Utos ni P-Noy, wala nang kotong.
Tsino: Aba sige, mula ngaun hindi na ako dura sa kape mo!
oOo
Varied reactions during sex:
Callgirl: Are you finished?
Young girl: Don’t stop don’t stop!
Old woman: Some more some more!
Wife: We should repaint our ceiling!
oOo
TANONG ng BAYAN:
May question lang ako, sa pagkuha ng driver’s license, anong kulay ng buhok ang inilalagay sa mga kalbong driver?
oOo
Boy: ms Baril ka ba??
Girl: Eee..banat ba yan? dahil ba tinamaan ka sakin?
Boy: ang lakas kasi ng Putok mo!
oOo
TEACHER: Kung meron akong 5 anak sa una ko asawa, 4 sa ikalawa & 3 sa huli..anong meron ako?
JUAN: Maam, kalandian po!
oOo
BOY: Inday bili mo nga ko ng safeguard!!!
INDAY: Huwag mo naman ako sigawan di ako binge! Anong sim card? Smart o Globe?
oOo
ALL above SMS Jokes courtesy of Mike
