Archive for 31 January, 2011

MARU | 31 January, 2011
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SMS Jokes 2011-166

BOSS: “Why should we hire you?”
TIKYO : “Mas mabuti yung bago, Maam, wala pang sungay.”
BOSS: “Please translate that in English.”
TIKYO: “Well, you see Maam, I’m brand new, so I’m not yet horny.”

POL: “What is the differences between the breast of an old woman and a banana?
JACK: “Uhhmmnn…They are both SAGGING!”

Umiihi ang isang Lasing sa isang tabi at nakita ni Aling Tekla…
ALING TEKLA: “Ay! Ano ba yan? Ang liit ng titi at ang lago ng bulbol!”
LASING: “GAGA! Mas maganda na to kesa naman, maliit ang bulbol at malago ang titi.”

Nag lalakad ang tatlong loko…..
JUAN: “Ano laro tayo ng padirian!”
PEDRO: “Sige! Bah! Magaling yata ako dyan.”
TOTO: “Ok”
JUAN: Dumura ng berdeng plema sa pader.
PEDRO: Suminga ng berdeng sipon sa pader.
Wala maisip si Toto.
TOTO: Dinilaan ang pader.

(Panalo si Toto!)

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Category: HUMOR, January 2011 | Tags: , , , , ,
MARU | 31 January, 2011
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Narcissa

One hazy lazy Sunday afternoon. . . narcissism mode ang lola nyo.

Sa ngayon, pansamantala muna ninyo akong tawagin – Narcissa! Weeeeeeeeee! :P

http://www.metacafe.com/watch/5884114/

Audio Track: GRAVITY by Sara Bareilles

oOo

Category: Songs and Videos | Tags: ,
MARU | 30 January, 2011
2 comments

Knock! Knock!

Knock! knock!

  • Who`s there?
    CASHEW NUT.
    CASHEW NUT who?
    Don`t tell me your sorry, CASHEW NUT. Baby when I know you’re only sorry you got caught…
  • Who’s there?
    SHUTTLE
    SHUTTLE who?
    SHUTTLEthe heart, and you’re to blame. You give love a bad name
  • Who’s there?
    TUNA PIE.
    TUNA PIE who?
    TUNA PIE, TUNA limit, TUNA wall… for a chance to be with you i’d rather risk it all. TUNA PIE, TUNA fever come what may!
  • Who’s there?
    SOON TO OPEN PAN DE MANILA.
    SOON TO OPEN PAN DE MANILAwho?
    Uno, dos, tres! SOON TO OPEN PAN DE MANILA!
    (Ricky Martin)
  • Who’s there?
    HITO
    HITO who?
    HITO AKO… basang basa sa ulaaaan..
  • Who`s there?
    SOLUSYON
    Solusyon who?
    SOLUSYON, sa Visayas at sa Mindanao
    san mang sulok ng mundo na may Pilipino..
Category: HUMOR | Tags:
MARU | 30 January, 2011
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Sunday Thought


LET GO.


“Letting go doesn’t mean giving up… it means moving on. It is one of the hardest things a person can do. Starting at birth, we grasp on to anything we can get our hands on, and hold on as if we will cease to exist when we let go.

We feel that letting go is giving up, quitting, and that as we all know is cowardly. But as we grow older we are forced to change our way of thinking. We are forced to realize that letting go means accepting things that cannot be. It means maturing and moving on, no matter how hard you have to fight yourself to do so.” ~ Unknown

Category: Personal Thoughts, Quotes and Poetry | Tags:
MARU | 29 January, 2011
6 comments

Love Thee (Part 2)

1-29-2011 12-23-35 PM

 

41. Love him for always making me cry. Tears washes my eyes. Perhaps for me to see more clearly.

42. Love him for the dozen of roses he sent. I displayed them all in one corner of my house. I still adore seeing them every day – dried.

43. Love him for the ring. Though haven’t tried it on, it melts my heart just staring at it. Wondering if it fits my finger. I don’t have a ring. Never had one.

44. Love him for not scolding me. Not even once. For my offenses and mistakes.

45. Love him for always leaving me without a word. Maybe for him to test me if I am still here when he comes back.

46. Love him for ignoring me. For the silent treatment. Gives me time to scrutinize and be connected to myself once again.

47. Love him for emailing me jokes. He makes “ambag” to my collection of SMS jokes. He supports Maruism.

48. Love him for giving me his pictures. More than 5 pieces already! For me to share to my friends and prove that, “Hey! See! He’s real!”

49. Love him for not staying up late at night anymore. His doctor will be glad.

50. Love him for no more waking up and dragging himself out of the bed very early in the morning. No more unholy hours of getting up just to talk to me online. Although I miss the deed. He will be healthier. His doctor will be happier.

51. Love him for sharing me stories about England. The lousy weather, the snow, et al.

 

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Category: Kups | Tags:
MARU | 28 January, 2011
3 comments

Friday Mood Booster

You don’t need everything to enjoy life.

You already have life to enjoy everything.

oOo


Category: Personal Thoughts, Quotes and Poetry | Tags:
MARU | 28 January, 2011
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Spending My Time

Spending my early Friday morning with Roxette.

YouTube Preview Image

What’s the time? Seems it’s already morning
I see the sky, it’s so beautiful and blue
The TV’s on, but the only thing showing
Is a picture of you

Oh I get up and make myself some coffee
I try to read a bit but the story’s too thin
I thank the Lord above that you’re not here to see me
In this shape I’m in

Spending my time, watching the days go by
Feeling so small, I stare at the wall
Hoping that you think of me too
I’m spending my time

I try to call but I don’t know what to tell you
I leave a kiss on your answering machine
Oh help me please, is there someone who can make me
Wake up from this dream?

Spending my time, watching the days go by
Feeling so small, I stare at the wall
Hoping that you think of me too

I’m spending my time, watching the sun go down
I fall asleep to the sound of “Tears of a clown”
A prayer gone blind
I’m spending my time

My friends keep telling me
“Hey life will go on”
Time will make sure I get over you oh
This silly game of love
You play, you win, only to lose

Spending my time, watching the days go by
Feeling so small I stare at the wall
Hoping that you think of me too

I’m spending my time, watching the sun go down
I fall asleep to the sound of “Tears of a clown”
A prayer gone blind
I’m spending my time

oOo

Category: Personal Thoughts, Songs and Videos | Tags: ,
MARU | 28 January, 2011
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Diet Pills

 

diet pills

Some people are so desperate to trim their extra body bulges that they would resort to buying cheap diet-pills. Very dangerous indeed. Some of the many side-effects of those cheap pills are feeling of anxiety or nervousness, heart problems, diarrhea, irregular heartbeat, high blood pressure, and even heart attacks. I hope people would think many times before indulging to those cheap “quick-fix” weight loss pills. Check and read first the product review before buying.

 

Category: GENERAL, Task2Blog | Tags:
MARU | 28 January, 2011
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Go Natural

Makers of weight loss pills are really all out in their campaign, making big promises to consumers that their products are effective. I am not saying all companies. In fairness to other manufacturers, some users testified that theirs is authentic and really work.

However, there are some pill product that purely offer guarantees as merely lip service. Take the case of Lipozene or better yet read the lipozene review and know it yourself. Anyway, instead of pills, I hope consumers would still prefer to go on the natural way of losing fat. The best way of course, is not to overeat and go for proper exercise regularly.

Category: GENERAL, Task2Blog | Tags:
MARU | 27 January, 2011
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Hehehe!

‘La lang. Natuwa lang ako at nakita ko ulit sya sa FB ko.

Sobrang na-miss ko ang taong ‘to. Tagal kasi nag-hibernate. Siguro bisi-bisihan. Siguro gumagawa sila ng beybi. Siguro balak na nila sundan ang panganay nila.

Isa sa mga hinahangaan kong blogger – si Badoodles! (http://kwentongbarbero.com )

1-27-2011 9-28-15 PM

Welcome back, pre! Update na agad ng blog. Dalii! :P

Category: PEOPLE and POLITICS | Tags:
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