SMS Jokes 2011-162

oOo

Anak: “Itay, nakita ko na po ang pakakasalang kong babae. Kamukhang-kamukha siya ni Inay pati ugali.”
Ama: “Ano ngaun ang gusto mo sa akin? Awa?”

oOo

Misis: “hayup ka, madaling araw ka na naman umuwi! san ka na naman galing?”
Mister: “wag ka na magalit, sa simbahan ako galing…”
Misis: “sinong nilolo ko mo? sarado ang simbahan sa gabi!”
Mister: “bakit? natutulog ba ang diyos?”

oOo

Teacher: “What does your father do for a living?”
Student: “He is a magician.”
Teacher: “What is his favorite event?”
Student: “He cuts people in two.”
Teacher: “How many brother and sisters do you have?”
Student: “One half-brother and one half-sister….”

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One night in the garden of Eden, after Adam and Eve quarreled. Adam prayed fervently: “Lord, make me another woman; total marami pa naman akong ribs!”

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All the women in an office got up in arms about the notice posted on the executive lounge:

“Any executive whose personal assistant is ill or on leave may take advantage of the girls who work on the reception area.”

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Questions without Answers

1. Where did Rachelle Anne Go?
2. Why is Norman Black or Chris Brown?
3. Is Chow Yun Fat?
4. When will Orlando Bloom?
5. What is Victoria’s Secret?
6. What does David Cook?
7. What did Henry Sy?

oOo

A man placed some flowers on the grave of his mother when he saw another man kneeling a nearby grave. The man seemed to be praying intensely and kept repeating, “Why did you have to die?”

The first man approached him and said, “Sir, I don’t wish to interfere with your profound grief but for whom do you mourn so deeply?”

The mourner collected himself then replied, “My wife’s first husband.”

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The toughest question ever is here!

When do you know you are in love?

You know you are in love when you start looking for the cheapest mobile plan.:D

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Man told his doctor that he wasn’t able to do all the things around the house that he used to. When the doctor’s examination was completed the man said, “Now, Doc, tell me in plain language what’s wrong with me?”

“Well,” replied the doc, “you’re just a plain old lazy fart.”

“Thank you,” said the man. “Now give me the medical term so I can tell my old lady.”

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Emo at Juan naligo sa ulan..
EMO: “I love the rain because no one can see me crying..”
JUAN: “Ako din! Hindi halatang umiihi na ako sa ulan!”

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All of the above SMS Jokes – thru the kindness of Mike.

H A P P Y W E E K E N D E V E R Y O N E!

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