SMS Jokes 2011-175

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Husband to Hotel Manager: “Please come immediately. My wife wants to jump out of the window.”
Hotel Manager: “What can I do to help, sir?”
Husband: “Idiot! The window is locked!”

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A police recruit was asked during the exam, “What would you do if you had to arrest your mother-in-law?”
He replied, “Call for backup.”

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Boss: “Did you get any orders today?”
Salesman: “Yes, I got two!”
Boss: “Congratulations! What were they?”
Salesman: “Get out!” and “Stay out!”

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A friend asked a lady, “I supposed you carry a memento of some sort in that locket of yours?”
“Yes, a strand of my husband’s hair.”
“But your husband’s still alive!”
“Yes. But his hair’s gone!”

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“Oh gosh,” sighed a wife, “I’m convinced my mind is almost completely gone!”
Her husband looks up from the newspaper and remarks, “I’m not surprised. You’ve been giving me a piece of it everyday for thirty years!”

 

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