SMS Jokes 2011-187

"HAPDI"
Yan ang tawag pag pumasok ka ng kalahating araw sa school o sa work.
"Sir/mam, pwde po ba mag HAPDI?" 

There will be less scandals in Catholic churches next year.. .
If Priests and Bishops are allowed to use condoms.

A NEGATIVE person sees the glass of water half empty. . .
A POSITIVE persons sees it half full. . .
But a REALISTIC person adds 100 ml of Whiskey to it and says. . . CHEERS!

One attractive young businesswoman to another over lunch:
"My life is all math. I am trying to add to my income, subtract from my weight, divide my time, and avoid multiplying."

TEACHER: “Billy, stop making faces.”
BILLY: “Why??”
TEACHER: “Well, when I was your age, I was told that if I kept making ugly faces, my face would stay that way.”
BILLY: “Well, I can see you didn’t listen!”

A man came up and shook my hands and asked how my sex life was.
I told him, "You are shaking hands with it."

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