Monday Humor 01.23.12

**Courtesy of MIKE

(`’.? ? ?.’)
?(`’. ? .’)?
kiong hee huat chai! 
(_.’ ??? `’._)
?(_.’ ? `’._)? Happy Chinese New Year!! 🙂

new-year-cartoon Kiong Hee wat Chai from your Chinese friends who were:
Born during the night: – Andy Lim
Born blind: – Kenneth See
Born fat: – Bob Uy
Born tiny: – Kathy Ting
Born different: – Eva Yan
Born on sunday: – Lyn Go
Born with picture: – Lara Huan
Born with sweets: – Ken Dy
Born secretly: – Tina Go
Born maniac: – Hayden Kho
Born Normal: – Nat Ting Wong
Born abnormal: – Sam Ting Wong
Born ugly: – Edi Sia
Born mahilig: – Eh di You!

Maka survive ka pa kaya kapag Pilipino na ang Math? Halimbawa..
"Square root of X raised to the power of 10."
Sa Pilipino..
"Parisukat ugat ng ekis itaas sa kapangyarihan ng sampu!"
O di ba? Kung NOSEBLEED ka sa English, TUYO naman ang dugo mo sa Pilipino! 

GF: "You have nothing in your HEAD, then why are you putting on such beauty HAT?"
BF: "You always wear beautiful BRAs, but did I ever say anything about your lemon-sized BOOBS?"

LUCY TORRES: "Walang disenteng babae ang tumatawag sa may asawa ng 3am! Maghanap ka ng sarili mong asawa!"
VICE GANDA: "Walang disenteng babae ang tumatawag sa may asawa ng 3am. 4:30 ka tumawag!"

AMA: "Bakit bagsak grades mo?"
ANAK: "How can i pass if my teacher hates me? parang LOVE lang yan, kahit gaano ka man kaseryoso, kung ayaw sayo, hindi ka papasa!"
AMA: "Naks! Nag-emote ang bobo!"

10 UTOS SA SEX (New)
1. Bawal maginarte ang virgin, pero pwedeng umaray.
2. Walang limitasyon kung san nyo gustong gawin.
3. Walamg time out. Masamang mabitin.
4. Dapat biyaheng langit.
5. Huwag itikom ang bibig. Puwedeng umungol sa sarap.
6. Dapat higit sa 3 ang style na kaya mo (dog style, helicopter, tipaklong upong labandera, upong sekretarya, etc.)
7. Huwag magmadali. Dahan-dahan lang.
8. Huwag kalimutan kumain. Kulang ang putahe. Mahalaga ang papel ng dila.
9. Huwag tumigil hangga’t hindi nasagad.
10. Higit sa lahat, kailangan labasan.

 

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