Friday Humor 04.13.12

**Courtesy of Raymund Romano (via FB email)

smelly feet

A Japanese came to Philippines.
He took a TAXI to go to hotel.
On the way a HONDA overtakes,
JAPANESE: "HONDA made in JAPAN very fast….."
Next a TOYOTA overtakes, he said "TOYOTA made in JAPAN, very fast."
Came at the hotel he asked how much?
DRIVER (ehem): "2500Php"
JAPANESE: "Why so expensive?"
DRIVER: "METER made in Philippines very fast…"

Boy did mistake
Girl shouted at him
Boy said : "Sorry…."
Girl did mistake
Boy shouted at her
Girl started crying
Boy said : "Sorry!"

MATHEMATICS TEACHER:"How can you distribute 8 apples among 6 people equally….??"
STUDENT: "By Making Juice"

FATHER: "How Are Your Grades, Son?"
SON: "Under Water, Dad."
FATHER: "Under Water? What Do You Mean?"
SON: "They Are "Below C Level"

HEART T0UCH!NG ST0RY!!!
A b0y l0ved a girl but never pr0p0sed her. One day he decided t0 tell her at 1:00 am at night.

He type: "I L0VE y0u"
And sent it, after a few sec0nds he g0t a message but he decided t0 see it the next day f0r surprise and slept.
Next day, he read the message and bec0me s0 sh0cked because it was written:
ADVISORY: Message sending fail due t0 insufficient balance. Please rel0ad to maintain y0ur acc0unt ..

This dog, is dog, a dog, good dog, way dog, to dog, keep dog, an dog, idiot dog, busy dog,for dog, 30 dog, seconds dog!

Now read without the word dog.

A mAnageMent student hUgs a girl..
GIRL: "What is this?"
BOY: "Direct marketing."
*girl slaps the boy*
BOY:"What is this?"
GIRL: "CustOmers feed bAck!"

TANONG: ANO ANG FAVORITE HOLIDAY NG MGA BADING??
SAGOT: EASTER SUNDAY!
Bakit?
ENJOY NA ENJOY SILA NA MAG-EGG HUNTING!

Death of Mr. Bean’s Mother:
MR. BEAN: (Crying) "The doctor just called up, my mom’s dead.
Friend: Condolence, my friend."
(After 2 minutes, Mr. Bean cries even louder.)
FRIEND: "What now, Mr. Bean?"
MR.BEAN: "My Sister just called. Her mom died too. huhuhu!"

A girl hops on the elevator turns and smiles at a man next to her and says T.G.I.F. the man smiles back and says S.H.I.T.
Girl looks at him & repeats her self with an angry voice T.G.I.F. the man smiles & repeats himself as well S.H.I.T. the girl pissed of says: "Look Mr., I’m trying to be nice with yio and say ‘Thank God Its Friday’ and u come up with ur stupid remark!"
Man says: "I was trying to be nice also and i was correcting you, Sorry Honey Its Thursday…"

Filipino menu, reason our race is in every nation.
1. BOKA BOKA – Bopis, Kanin, Bokayo, Kape
2. BOKA BOKA MO PA – Bopis, Kanin, Bokayo, Kape, Molong Pancit
3. DILA – Dinuguan, Laing
4. DILAAN MO – Dinuguan, Laing, Dalandan, Molo
5. PAKALOG – Pandesal, Kanin, Itlog
6. MAALOG NA BETLOG – Maalat na Itlog, Pakbet, Itlog
7. BAHAW – Bakang Inihaw (kala nyo kanin noh?)
8. HIMAS SUSO – Hipon Malasado, Sugpo, Keso
9. HIMAS PEKPEK – Hipon Malasado, Kropek, Pinekpekan
10. PEKPEK MONG MALAKI – Kropek, Pinekpekan, Monggo, Malasado, Laing, Kilawin
11. KANTOT – Kanin, Tortang Talong
12. KANTOT PA – Kanin, Tortang Talong, Pancit
13. SUBO – Sugpo, Bopis
14. SUBO MO – Sugpo, Bopis, Molo
15. SUBO MO PA – Sugpo, Bopis, Molo, Pancit
NOW, YOU BELIEVE, FILIPINO CUISINE MENUS CAN BE SO APPETIZING, SERVE WITH SIZZLING LIBIDO…
ENJOY YOUR MEAL, BON APPETITI!!!

GIYERA sa LIBYA,
TSUNAMI sa JAPAN,
LINDOL sa HAITI,
SINKHOLE sa CHINA
PUTOL-ARI sa THAILAND
KURAKOT sa PILIPINAS
at unti-unting PAGLUBOG ng ANTARTICA.
-ilan lang yan sa dahilan ng pagkamatay ng libu-libong tao dito sa mundo at kumalat na ang balita tungkol sa nalalapit na paggunaw ng mundo. subalit mayroon pa tayong pagasa! At yun ay walang iba kundi hanapin ang mga nawawalang PITONG DRAGON BALLS para maligtas ang sanlibutan!

 

oOo

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