Friday Humor 05.10.13

compliment

RAM: "Doc, bakit po ganun? Pag nananaginip ako, sumasayaw ako."
DOC: "Eto gamot jan, inumin mo ito."
RAM: "Wag doc!"
DOC: "Bakit?"
RAM: "GRAND FINALS NA EH!"

Isang shoot ng TV ad starring Coco Martin. Instruction ni Direk na pagkatapos humigop ni Coco ng kapeng ineendorse niya ay kailangan niyang ngumiti at sabihin "sarap" with feelings.
DIREK: "Okay. Lights. Camera. Action!"
COCO: (higop kape) "THARAAAP!"
DIREK: "OMG! Cut!"
Ilang minuto after..
DIREK: "Okay. Eto na lang. English para sossy. Coco, you will say "delicious" after you higop-higop the kape, ha?!"
COCO: "Got it, direk!"
DIREK: "Okay. Lights. Cameraa… Action!"
COCO: (higop kape) "DELITHYOOOTH!"
DIREK: "Mahabaging Birhen! CUT!"
COCO: "Direk, pathentya na. Baka pwedeng "yummy" na lang kathi?"
At muli siyang humigop ng kape at sinabi ang maalamat na linyang… "YUMMY!"

An English prof wrote the sentence, "a woman without her man is nothing" on the whiteboard and asked his students to punctuate it properly.
All the male students wrote:
"A woman, without her man, is nothing."
The female students wrote:
"A woman: without her, man is nothing."
LESSON: Punctuation is powerful.

Saan dumadaan ang mga lalaki?
CLASSMATE1: "E di sa butas."
CLASSMATE2: "Mali ka naman eh! san dumadaan ang lalake? Sa likod o harap?"
CLASSMATE1: "Ayyy, malibog to."
CLASSMATE2: "Gaga hindi! I mean sa entrance o exit."
CLASSMATE1: "Aala. malibog to."
CLASSMATE2: "Rhan! (bading na classmate) saan dumadaan ang mga lalaki? entrance o exit?"
RHAN: "Sa entrance."
CLASSMATE2: "Ay lalake to."
CLASSMATE1: "Bakit?"
CLASSMATE2: "Kapag entrance sa babae yun. Kapag exit sa lalaki."

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