Tuesday Humor 05.28.13

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Sa SM..ay kinausap si Juan na maganda at seksing babae.
JUAN: "Hi, miss. nawawala kasi asawa ko eh, pwede mo ba akong kausapin kahit 10 minutes lang?"
BABAE: "Bakit?"
JUAN: "Kasi tuwing may kinakausap akong seksing babae, bigla na lang sumusulpot yung asawa ko mula kung saan."

Sa mental..
May dalawang baliw, si Juan at si Pedro na dahil walang magawa ay naisipang mag-aral ulit kaya kumuha sila ng mga lumang libro at pumunta sa ilalim ng puno na kumwari ay school. Kinabukasan, nauna si Juan at umakyat sa puno. nang makita siya ni Pedro tinanong kung bakit nasa taas siya ng puno . Sagot ni Juan, "Graduate na ako ng elementary, HIGH school na ako!"

Pinakamatinding kasinungalingan sa mundo:
1. Okay lang ako.
2. Yon na yong pang-huli kong bubble gum.
3. I agree to the Terms & Conditions.

"Wow, you’re amazing!" she told a man after they made love. "With qualities like that, you must drive dozens of women crazy."
"Not at all,"
the man replied. "In fact, I’m choosy. I’m only into women I can really talk to, for example about politics, psychology, arts, science, music and classical literature.. in short, a woman has to be an intellectual to land in my bed."
She was obviously flattered, "So what impressed you most about me?"
"Your tits, of course."

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