Archive for Kups

Dear Future Boyfriend

Dinikwat ko lang itetch mula sa isang site at hindi ko sasabihin kung saan galing. . . pwera na lang kung pipilitin nyo ko. Chos!

Pinalitan ko lang dito ang ibang words para medyo maging swak sa katayuan ko at sa totoong nararamdaman ko.

 

 

 

Dear Future Boyfriend,

I’m sorry for the fights that we’ll get into. I’m sorry for making you cry. I’m sorry for lying. I’m sorry if I get jealous. I’m sorry if I act childish sometimes. I’m sorry if I’m a pain in the ass sometimes. And I’m sorry for everything that I’ll do to make you unhappy. I thank you for all the smiles that you’ll bring me, all the happiness you can give me. I thank you for being there for when I need you the most. Thank you for brightening up my day. If you make me cry, then that’s okay. Just don’t make that a habit. If you hold my hand, hold it tight so that you can make sure that I don’t slip away. If you hold me, just know that I won’t stop smiling. I want you to know that if I ever do slip away, I didn’t want to, but it was something that I couldn’t help. And when I realize how stupid I was, I hope that you still haven’t given up on me yet. And I hope that you’ll still be there to give me another chance because I would give you that second chance.

If you make me cry, then that’s okay. They say that guys aren’t worth my tears, but I want you to be the guy that’s worth my tears. I know that there’ll be times where I can’t always make you happy. I know that there will be times where I won’t be able to see you because of my kids, but know that I really just want to be with you right at that moment and know that I just want to be in your arms. I don’t need you to kiss me every minute like how some couples are because I’d rather you just surprise me. I’ll love it when you make me laugh, even if it’s something completely stupid, a cheesy pick up line, a silly face, anything, I’ll love it. I’ll introduce you to my friends if you want and you can introduce me to yours, but that really doesn’t matter to me. Knowing you is good enough for me.

I won’t fall for any of your friends because I know how much you’d hate that and why would I want them when I have you? I just hope that you can do the same. I’ll watch movies with you all day if you wanted to – your favorite movies, my favorite movies, new movies, any movie. We can go to the park and run around you can chase me around the playground. We can take a train to Paris and then wind up not getting off until the last stop. When we do get off, we can just take another train and it won’t matter which stop we get off at. We can stay up all night on Skype and not even say anything to each other. You don’t need to shower me with gifts and roses or spend every money in your wallet to keep me. I’m not the selfish or materialistic type. All I want is some good quality time. We could be laying around, doing absolutely nothing, and I’ll be more than satisfied. Future boyfriend, I hope that I’ll meet and see you soon.

-MARU

oOo

 

Usap 013

 

K U P S : “mga babae…di maintindihan.”
K U P S : “pag sinabihang i love you, ayaw maniwala…pag di naman sinabihan, sasabihin di sila mahal.”
M A R U : “eh ganun talaga.”
M A R U : “eh kasi babae.”
K U P S : “babae ka nga.”
M A R U : “mamahalin nyo ba kami kung naiintindihan nyo kami?”
K U P S : “dapat babae ang 8th wonder of the world eh.”

 
Oists! Kayong mga lalaki, sa presinto na lang kayo magreklamo. Kung ako nga mismo di ko maintindihan pagkababae ko (nananaig kasi ang pagka-bakla ko minsan), kayo pa kaya?
 
Pero sorry na lang, um-agree na lang kayo, ang naturalesang pagiging krung-krung namin, yan ang mas lalong nagpapasarap sa aming mga girlash. :P
 

Kaya naman mas lalo kaming napapamahal sa inyong mga betlogins ay dahil walang sinabi ang Calculus kung hirap o pagiging kumplikado din lang ang pag uusapan para maintindihan kami. You guys, simply love challenges, di ba? 

Uyeh! Panahon na nga siguro na mapabilang kami sa totoong 8th Wonder of the World

 

 

oOo

"Lalake lang ‘yan… malayo sa bituka" – Empress Schuck, BFF: Best Friends Forever (2009)

 

Pandagdag Kaalaman 2

Galing Gmail ko, mula sa kabutihang-loob ni Kups ko. Charot!

  1. The first female monster to appear on the big screen was Bride of Frankenstein.
  2. Before Mickey Mouse, Felix the Cat was the most popular cartoon character.
  3. Chewing gum is outlawed in Singapore because it is a means of "tainting an environment free of dirt."
  4. An apple, onion, and potato all have the same taste. The differences in flavor are caused by their smell. To prove this – pinch your nose and take a bite from each. They will all taste sweet.
  5. Spam stands for Shoulder Pork and Ham.
  6. Only food that does not spoil: honey.
  7. A hard-boiled egg will spin. An uncooked or soft-boiled egg will not.
  8. A "sysygy" occurs when all the planets of our Solar System line up.
  9. "Bookkeeper" is the only word in English language with three consecutive Double letters.
  10. The only 2 animals that can see behind itself without turning it’s head are the rabbit and the parrot.
  11. The word ‘set ‘ has the most number of definitions in the English language: 192.
  12. Hummingbirds are the only animal that can also fly backwards.
  13. Algebra, Trigonometry and Calculus are studies which originated in India.
  14. One thousand contains the letter A, but none of the words from one to nine hundred ninety-nine has an A.
  15. The word four has four letters. In the English language there is no other number whose number of letters is equal to its value.
  16. No two zebras have stripes that are exactly alike.
  17. There is a city called Rome on every continent.
  18. "Almost" is the longest word in the English language with all the letters in alphabetical order.

 

* * * *

#2 – Hala! Akala ko eh nung 80′s lang sumikat si Felix Bakat err the Cat.

#4 – Sus! Busy ako para patunayan pa yan. Kebs ko naman kung magkapareho sila ng lasa.

#6 – Trulili! May bote ako ng honey na 3 years na yata dito sa akin, hindi ko sya inilalagay sa loob ng ref at hanggang ngayon ay hindi sya nasisira. Duda ko, baka mas malaki pa ang tsansa na mauna akong masira kesa honey ko.

honey

#7 – Ang nasubukan ko lang noon, ay may lalaki na halos ay umi-spin ang ulo, nung nahawakan at napiga ko ang soft eggs. :P

#14 – Uy! Nag-isip at nagbilang pa talaga ako sa nalaman kong ‘to ha. Oo nga noh!

 

oOo

"At the end of the day, even though things have changed, some things remain the same, di ba? Kaya dapat huwag mo kakalimutn ang lumang ikaw"Derek Ramsey, ONE MORE CHANCE (2007)

Pandagdag Kaalaman

Gustong-gusto ko pag may sini-share o pinapadala sa akin si Kups sa Gmail ko na mga INTERESTING FACTS chuchu.

Aminin ko, interesado akong magbasa ng mga ganitetch. Pakiramdam ko kasi ay nagiging SMART (sori GLOBE) at nagle-level up ako sa mga nalalaman ko.

Tsaka siguro kung ganito palagi ang pinapadala sa akin ni Kups imbes na mga naked pics nya (Hihihi! To Kups:image) ay kahit papano ay mababawasan ang kalawang sa pumupurol kong utak.

Desidido na ako, tatantanan ko na rin ang kababasa ng mga erotic sex stories. Hahaha! Hmp! Ganun din naman, reading sex stories, may madagdag man sa akin na kaalaman tungkol sa mga teknik ng mga makamundong pagnanasa ek-ek, waley naman din akong pag-aaplayan sa true to life. Lech!

Kaya dapat mga ganito na lang talaga ang binabasa ko kasi sure na sure may mapapala pa akong kaalaman. Naks!

  1. Venus is the only planet that rotates clockwise.
  2. The word “modem” is a contraction of the words “modulate, demodulate.” (MOdulate DEModulate)
  3. Crossing one’s fingers is a way of secretly making the sign of the Cross. It was started by early Christians to ask for divine assistance without attracting the attention of pagans.
  4. In the 1700′s you could purchase insurance against going to hell, in London England.
  5. Ferdinand Porsche, who later went on to build sports cars bearing his own name, designed the original 1936 Volkswagen.
  6. The first product Motorola started to develop was a record player for automobiles. At that time the most known player on the market was the Victrola, so they called themselves Motorola.
  7. Leonardo da Vinci could write with one hand and draw with the other at the same time.
  8. Florence Nightingale served only two years of her life as a nurse. She contracted fever during her service in the Crimean War, and spent the last 50 years of her life as an invalid.
  9. Each king in a deck of playing cards represents a great king from history. Spades – King David; mickey mouseClubs – Alexander the Great; Hearts - Charlemagne; and Diamonds – Julius Caesar.
  10. Actor Steve McQueen encouraged his karate teacher to pursue a career in acting. The teacher? Chuck Norris. McQueen is quoted as telling Norris, “If you can’t do anything else’ there’s always acting.”
  11. Mickey Mouse was the first non-human to win an Oscar.
  12. The “glair” is the white or clear part of an egg. The word glair comes from the Latin clarus, meaning “clear.”
  13. MAFIA is an acronym for Morte Alla Francia Italia Anela, or “Death to the French is Italy’s Cry”
  14. acetwothreefourfivesixseveneightninetenjackqueenking Excluding the joker, if you add up the letters in all the names of the cards in the deck (Ace, two, three, four,…,king). the total number of letters is 52, the same as the number of cards in the deck.
  15. It is believed that Shakespeare was 46 around the time that the King James Version of the Bible was written. In Psalms 46, the 46th word from the first word is shake and the 46th word from the last word is spear.

****

#3 – Sa Pinoy… Peksman ang tawag natin diyan di ba? Bakit kaya Peksman?

#4 – Kung meron pa nito hanggang ngayon, sigurado ko mamamakyaw ng insurance ang mga kurap na politiko at ang mga mayayamang mapang-api! Lol!

#7 – Ang nanay (RIP) ko naman, ay marunong humawak ng bolpen at magsulat mapa-kaliwa o kanan man na kamay. Hindi nga lang sabay gaya ni Da Vinci.

#9 – Attention mga sugarol at adik sa tong-its: knows nyo ba ‘to? If not, pakatitigan nyo next time ang mga hawak na baraha.

#15 – Trulili! I just Googled it.

 

oOo

“Ang pag-ibig pala parang bill ng kuryente. Ang daming hidden charges, wala kang laban” – Janus del Prado, I Do (2011)

Saturday Humor From Kups

In a tiny village lived an old maid. In spite of her old age, she was still a virgin. She was very proud of it. She knew her last days were getting closer, so she told the local undertaker that she wanted the following inscription on her tombstone:

"Born as a virgin, lived as a virgin, died as a virgin."

Not long after, the old maid died peacefully, and the undertaker told his men what the lady had said. The men went to carve it in, but as the lazy no-goods they were, they thought the inscription to be unnecessarily long.

They simply wrote: "Returned unopened."

  •  

A reporter was doing a story on gender roles in Kuwait several years before the Gulf War. She noted then that women customarily walked about 10 feet behind their husbands.

She returned to Kuwait recently and observed that the men now walked several yards behind their wives.

The reporter approached one of the women and said, "This is marvelous. Can you tell the free world just what enabled women here to achieve this reversal of roles?"

"Land mines," said the Kuwaiti woman.

  •  

Little Tony was staying with his grandmother for a few days. He’d been playing outside with the other kids for awhile when he came into the house and asked her, "Grandma, what is it called when 2 people are sleeping in the same room and one is on top of the other?"

She was a little taken aback, but decided to tell him the truth. "It’s called sexual intercourse, darling."

Little Tony just said, "Oh, OK" and went back outside to the other kids.

A few minutes later he came back in and said angrily, "Grandma, it is not called sexual intercourse! It’s called Bunk Beds! And Jimmy’s Mom wants to talk to you right now.”

  •  

As a concierge at a posh resort, I was often asked about the ski facilities. One day a couple who had just checked in after a long flight came by and asked me where the lift was.

"Go down the hill," I told them, "out the door, past the pool, 200 yards down the block, and you’ll see it on your right."

Their tired faces suddenly looked even more exhausted, until the man behind them spoke up.

"They’re from England," he said. "I think they’re looking for the elevator."

  •  

A dwarf gets on an elevator and pushes the button to go up, just before the door closes, a hand comes through and opens the door.

In steps a very large black man. The dwarf stares and says "You’re the biggest man I have ever seen". The man nods his head, and replies " I’m 6-9, weigh 259 lbs., and I have 16 inches, I’m Turner Brown. The dwarf faints! After coming too, the dwarf asks the man to repeat himself.  So he does, "I said I’m 6 – 9, 259 lbs., with 16 inches, my name is Turner Brown.?The dwarf looked relieved and started laughing. “For a minute there, I thought you said ‘Turn Around!”

  •  

The Italian man says, "Last week, my wife and I had great sex. I rubbed her body all over with olive oil, we made passionate love, and she screamed for five full minutes at the end."

The Frenchman boasts, "Last week when my wife and I had sex, I rubbed her body all over with butter. We then made passionate love and she screamed for fifteen minutes."

The Jewish man says, "Well, last week my wife and I had sex too. I rubbed her body all over with schmaltz (chicken fat), we made love, and she screamed for over six hours."

The Italian and Frenchman were stunned. They asked, "What could you have possibly done to make your wife scream for six hours?"

The Jewish man says, "I wiped my hands on the bedspread!!!"

  •  

QUESTION: What is the truest definition of Globalization?
ANSWER: Princess Diana’s death.
QUESTION: How come?
ANSWER: An English princess with an Egyptian boyfriend crashes in a French tunnel, driving a German car with a Dutch engine, driven by a Belgian who was drunk on Scottish whisky, (check the bottle before you change the spelling) followed closely by Italian Paparazzi, on Japanese motorcycles;
treated by an American doctor, using Brazilian medicines.

This is sent to you by an American, using Bill Gate’s technology, and you’re probably reading this on your computer, that uses Taiwanese chips, and a Korean monitor, assembled by Bangladeshi workers in a Singapore plant, transported by Indian lorry-drivers, hijacked by Indonesians, unloaded by Sicilian longshoremen, and trucked to you by Mexican illegals…..

That, my friends, is Globalization!

  •  

THE RICH

image001

THE POOR

image00222 

 

oOo

"Ang pag-ibig parang crispy pata ‘yan, ha. Masarap, pero deadly" – Janus del Prado, I Do (2010)

SMS Jokes 2011-203

Mga ambag JOKES mula sa pagmamalasakit ni Kups. Char!

Maraming salamat po, pogi. :P

A rapist with a knife threatened a nun:
"Life or Reputation?" After the rape, the nun got the knife, collared the rapist and said:
"Life or Repetition?"

COP1: “Bakit po K-9 ang tawag sa malalaking aso, sir!”
SUPT: “Syempre pag tinawag mo silang K-10, hindi na sila aso.”
Cop1: “Ano na sila sir?
SUPT: “maliit na pusa.”

MISIS: “Kung alam ko lang di sana ako nagpakasal sa iyo! ABS ka!”
MISTER: “Anong ABS?”
MISIS: “Alak, Babae, Sugal!”
MISTER: “Eh ikaw CBN!”
MISIS: “CBN?”
MISTER: “Chismosa, Bungangera, Nagger!”

TEACHER: “Imagine you’re a millionaire. Write your life history..
(1 boy didn’t write)
TEACHER: “Why are you not writing?”
BOY: “I’m waiting for my secretary.”

  •  

JUAN: “Naniniwala ka ba sa kasabihan na kapag tumuwad ang bata eh naghahanap ng kasunod?”
PEDRO: “Hindi naman!”
JUAN: “Bakit?”
PEDRO: “Mas maniwala ako kapag NANAY na ang TUMUWAD!”

3 Madre tsismisan:
MADRE1: “Masarap sa titi maikli pero mataba!”
MADRE2: “Mas masarap payat pero mahaba!”
MADRE3: “Sira, mas masarap mahaba na mataba pa!”
SUPERIORA: “Mga GAGA! Ang importante MATIGAS!”

TITSER: “Juan, use recharge and caffeine in a sentence.”
JUAN: “Si "Recharge" Gutierrez ay si "Caffeine" Barbell?”

GF: “Tara hatid mo ko sa bahay.”
BF: “Eh..wala akong pera ngayon, wala pang padala si mommy eh.”
GF: “Sayang walang tao sa bahay.”
BF: “Ay! Meron palang 500 dito… tara na!”

Problemado ka ba sa lovelife mo?
LQ? Sawi? Basted? Single since birth?
Baka kasi nakalimutan mo na sa lahat ng relasyon, kailangang idaan mo muna sa isang napakaimportanteng pagsubok.
Komunsulta sa paraan ng APOY.
Ang F.L.A.M.E.S.

 

 

oOo

"I like the way you bring out the best and worst in me" – Aga Muhlach, Dahil May Isang Ikaw (1999)

 

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Usap 010

 

Pasintabi sa mga kumakain.

 

KUPS (3/9/2011 9:38:49 PM):  busy?

MARU (3/9/2011 9:39:21 PM):  nangungulangot lang *pahid sa pader*

KUPS (3/9/2011 9:39:37 PM):  hmmn productive yan

MARU (3/9/2011 9:39:47 PM):  gusto mo ipahid ko sau?

KUPS (3/9/2011 9:39:55 PM):  wag nman

MARU (3/9/2011 9:40:19 PM):  ipitik ko kaya sau?

KUPS (3/9/2011 9:40:30 PM):  hmmn pwede rin

KUPS (3/9/2011 9:40:39 PM):  then hagis ko uli sa yo?

MARU (3/9/2011 9:40:44 PM):  kakainin mo?

KUPS (3/9/2011 9:40:57 PM):  busog na ko…tenkyu!


Finding fun in simple ways makes the happiest days.

 

Happy Friday, everyone!


Hahaha!

‘La lang, napatawa lang talaga ako ng main sponsor ko ng mga SMS jokes ko dito sa Maruism na si Mike.

Eh kasi babati din lang ng Happy Birthday ang loko ay sinamahan pa ng request na para bang mapapasubo yata ako.Lol!

frommike

Hindi ko akalain na curious si Mike kung may birthday greetings din si Kups sa akin. Hahaha! Heniways, sige isi-share ko.

Pero magpapakatotoo muna ako ha?

Kasalukuyang hindi kami in speaking term ni Kups. Gaya din ng ibang couple na nasa relasyon ay hindi kami exempted ni Kups sa mga pagsubok. Nagiging sunod-sunod ang problema namin lately.

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Love Thee (Part 2)

1-29-2011 12-23-35 PM

 

41. Love him for always making me cry. Tears washes my eyes. Perhaps for me to see more clearly.

42. Love him for the dozen of roses he sent. I displayed them all in one corner of my house. I still adore seeing them every day – dried.

43. Love him for the ring. Though haven’t tried it on, it melts my heart just staring at it. Wondering if it fits my finger. I don’t have a ring. Never had one.

44. Love him for not scolding me. Not even once. For my offenses and mistakes.

45. Love him for always leaving me without a word. Maybe for him to test me if I am still here when he comes back.

46. Love him for ignoring me. For the silent treatment. Gives me time to scrutinize and be connected to myself once again.

47. Love him for emailing me jokes. He makes “ambag” to my collection of SMS jokes. He supports Maruism.

48. Love him for giving me his pictures. More than 5 pieces already! For me to share to my friends and prove that, “Hey! See! He’s real!”

49. Love him for not staying up late at night anymore. His doctor will be glad.

50. Love him for no more waking up and dragging himself out of the bed very early in the morning. No more unholy hours of getting up just to talk to me online. Although I miss the deed. He will be healthier. His doctor will be happier.

51. Love him for sharing me stories about England. The lousy weather, the snow, et al.

 

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Paano Maglagay Ng BebelGam Sa Lilipap

Isa’t kalahating lucresia din ‘tong pretty ka-FB kong si Melith.

1-26-2011 9-39-57 AM

 

Kalokah! Umagang-umaga, nasa kalagitnaan ba naman ako ng pagro-rosaryo at ng Wednesday NOVENA ko (weh! di nga?! charot!), eh pasahan ba naman ako neto:

 

 

 

Sus mariano garapon! Buti na lang hindi ako mahilig sa bebelgam dahil aminado ako…wala akong ka-talent-talent sa ganito. Oo, mas gusto ko kumain ng lilipap, pero sensya na…ayaw ko talaga ng bebelgam. Ayaw! Ayaw! Ayaw! :D

Tenkyu Lord! Buti na lang pareho kami ni Kups na ayaw ng bebelgam! Wahaha! :D