Tag Archive for my books

SMS Jokes 2

Dionesia: judith! judith! judith!
Pacman: nay bakit? bakit ka sumisigaw?
Dionesia: Ang bayaring BELLS sa kuryente. judith ngayon.

* * * * *

One night wife play the national anthem while preparing for sex.
Hubby, “why are you playing this?”
Wife, “the whole country stands up when the anthem is played, let me see if it does any wonder for your dick.”

* * * * *
ERAP: Grabe na pala talaga ang crime rate dito sa Pilipinas, halos lahat wanted..Eto,

  • Wanted GR0
  • Wanted Driver
  • Wanted Acct.
  • Wanted Clerk..
  • pati Yaya wanted!!

* * * * *

ANAK: Tay! tignan mo abs ko! 6 pack yan, tay!
TATAY: wow! machong macho na anak ko ah! pano mo nagawa yan, nak?
ANAK: belly dancing, tay!

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Ang Ganda Ni Wanda Ilusyunada

Mga Kwentong Parlor Ni Wanda Ilusyunada

Ang librong ito ay Rated PG. Pa-Gurl. Ito ay koleksyon ng mga kwentong parlor tungkol sa pakikipagsapalaran ni Wanda Ilusyunada sa mundong in need for a total makeover. Sa gitna ng mga split ends at patay na kuko ay mga eksenang kabaklaan at panggu-goodtime, mga pang-o-okray at mga chenelyn bangungot sa buhay. Pwede kang matuwa, pwede ka ring mag inarte. Pero chikka lang. Ganyan si Wanda, ang pink sheep ng pamilya! Saving the world one chakka at a time bago man lang rumampa.

 

O hayan ha, namasahe pa ako sa eropleyn ng libo-libong pesoses mula Mindanao papuntang Manila para lang bumili lang ng bookleta mo na itech. Hehehe! Charooz!

Siempre pagdating ko ng Manila go ako agad sa pinakamalapit na National Bookstore . Una ko pinuntahan eh yung NBS-Ever Gotesco sa Ortigas Extn kasi malapit lang sa amin kaso wa pa daw sila abelabol. Natandaan ko sinabi mo sa shoutbox ng blog mo na sa Makati sigurado meron dun. Tama ka bakla, sa NBS-Glorietta ko nga sya natagpuan. Kabog!

Di naman ako nahirapan hanapin ang libro mo. Alam mo ba kung bakit? Itanong mo bilis!!! Nandun siya sa kababuyan! Bwahaha! Kasama nya ang sandamakmak na mga booklets na Pugad-Baboy ni Pol Medina Jr. Pero angat ang pink book mo dun, bakla! Nagmukha ka ngang muse sa gitna ng mga oink oink. Wahihi! O di ba? Sensya na at feeling-close ako sa yo kahit dehins mo ko kilala. Humahanga lang po.

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PMS + pasasalamat

… dami ko gagawing trabaho at mga aasikasuhin but i can feel 100-ton weights are in my feet.

… gloomy ang panahon parang nakikisakay sa mood ko.

… kulay-abo ang langit.

… am short of sleep na naman.

… gusto ko kumain ng saging na turon.

… maraming saging na turon.

… naiinis ako.

… my hormones are out of control again.

 

PASASALAMAT

thank you neybor moo (DEFPOTEC) for sending me this book, Alamat ng Gubat. hindi lang ako mag isa ang natawa at nakiliti sa bigay mo na ‘to. kevin and keziah as well. i will really cherish this stuff. bait mo talaga neybor moo. sana…wag ka muna kunin ni Lord. mwehehe. again, thank u very much.

Bob Ong's Alamat Ng Gubat

Bob Ong’s Alamat ng Gubat

ANG LIBRONG PAMBATA PARA SA MATATANDA!

Breakfast At Figaro

Had a short chit-chat over coffee and hearty breakfast with my YM buddy unoprimero (nice, funny and naughty guy indeed) at Figaro – Sta. Lucia East Mall. (who can say no to free breakfast meal? lol.) Also, he gave me this book as memento of our friendship. Aww! showbiz na showbiz ang tunog. hahaha! Thanks Uno.So excited to finish the book so next time i introduce myself to a guy, i’ll simply say it this way: “hi i’m Maruja …and i’m a bitch!” lol.


SMS Joke for Today:

Teacher: Who can give an example of a tag question?
Pupil: My Teacher is beautiful, isn’t she?
Teacher: Very good! Itagalog mo nga.
Pupil: Si maam ay maganda, hindi naman di ba?

BOOK: Why Men Marry Bitches: A Woman’s Guide to Winning Her Man’s Heart

browsed this book at National Bookstore while waiting for a friend.

curious ako malaman ang buong katotohanan at pawang katotohanan lamang … Why Men Marry Bitches samantalang pagkakaalam ko eh isa akong certified bitch, pero bakit di pa ako pinapakasalan? lolz!

this is a self-help paperback that looks like a must-read for every single who is in the dating world. the book include numerous relationship principles (RELATIONSHIP PRINCIPLE# 5 – Don’t believe what anyone tells you about yourself. Sophia Loren said, “Beauty is how you feel inside, and it reflects in your eyes. It is not something physical.” This is what makes you gorgeous to a quality man, because now you arrive complete. And that makes him say, “Gee, I wonder, what is that special magic she got?“)

gusto ku sana mapasaakin itung libru na tu kaso wa ku afford. so nagtiyaga ako sa pa flip-flip ng mga pages nya habang nakatayo. at nakuntento sa review rin ng isang author na si Barbara Rose,PhD:

“I really like this book! It’s a great read, no holes barred, tell it like it REALLY is book, and it’s the TRUTH! Who YOU are, what you love, your individual preferences and your backbone to dare to have the courage to be and express yourself EXACTLY as YOU want to, gives you the backbone, and the real inner confidence that is essential to a relationship – that you CAN LIVE WITHOUT – so you never buckle under and compromise your truth and dignity for anyone, ever.

Also, you’re not NEEDY, you are LIVING and being just who you are, and if he doesn’t like it, then he can buy a doormat at the local auto supply shop.

It takes GUTS and tremendous SELF LOVE to really be yourself, and feel complete solo – then a surprising thing happens, because you don’t need, you receive! And He receives the best too, once you know who you are, and what you’re REALLY all about, you’ll have the confidence that can sustain a great, EQUAL relationship.

The key here, sisters, is that he has to win YOU over. YOUR GENUINE CONFIDENCE AND BEING YOUR REAL SELF IS THE KEY!”


"petiks" moment

I was in Glorietta yesterday to meet an old and new friends.
The book bargain sale at the mall caught my attention and took away my 2 hours.

Went home with this:

SINGER Sewing For The Home = P140.00
The LITTLE BIG BOOK for BOYS = P140.00
How to be a Successful Housewife/Writer = P90.00
ME Time = Priceless!

My Ate Ellen from Canada sent me a portable sewing machine… just in time for my newly purchased sewing book. I’m so excited that i’ll be able to show off my sewing prowess once again. Bah, skilled ang lola! Bongga!